regulated**

Just when I think I have got it going on, I am pushed right back down.  

I know my nervous system is dysregulated.  I feel overcommitted and the tension building in my stress points. My breathing is shallow and I am not doing the self-care things I know I should be doing. 

You may be thinking- you’re a yoga teacher, how is that possible!?

If someone tells you they do not have days or moments of dysregulation, they are probably living in a cave, or lying to you- in my personal opinion.  

I am doing the things that I am supposed to do! I am going to yoga, eating well, taking deep calming breaths, listening to an audio book, and going for a walk.  

If you google how to treat nervous system regulation, you are informed of somatic exercises, deep breathing and lifestyle changes.  I am here to tell you that you can’t always yoga yourself out of imbalance. I know the techniques and yet; I am still in a state of high-arousal.  

Wait- I thought you said you were doing those things?

Yes, but with a giant asterisk next to each and everyone.

I am teaching seven yoga* classes, eating well* then grabbing a third cup of coffee and a sweet treat (or three), taking deep breaths* that hitch all the way out , listening to an audio book* while I never stop moving and going for a walk* to hit my step count for the day. Yup, that was one run-on of a sentence- because that has been my life.  A run-on of a to-do list, not self-care.

How does dysregulation manifest in me?

Brain fog. Feeling overwhelmed. Difficulty concentrating. Muscle tension. Fatigue. Digestive issues. Shallow breathing. Constant busyness. Poor diet choices- more caffeine and sugar.

What is the cause?

I stopped doing my self-care about three weeks ago.  I was in a great spot, I didn’t take care of myself because “I didn’t need it, I’m good!”.  Then came an epic snow storm, my body felt that one!, and five unexpected days with my whole family home.  I lost a week's worth of work time, partly because I love being present with my kids.  I love playing, being creative and the excuse to NOT work.  Fast forward to catching up on missed work days, only to now be 24 hours from spring break and ten more days without devoted work days.  I am in a state of trying to catch-up, while also trying to get ahead.  Guess what, it doesn’t work. My mind started racing and along with it, my body.  Everything was a to-do item. What is happening instead? I have a head cold and now the mixture of all the mucus, in an already cloudy headspace is equating to me being able to do anything but go to bed early.  Cue, more anxiety of what I am not accomplishing and the stress of being even further behind.  

So what now? 

I need to go back to my basics or my Essential 5

• Take a bath

• Read a real book

• Sit in meditation.  And follow the concept: “if you don’t have time for twenty minutes, you need an hour.”

• Go for long walks in the woods

• Move my body for ME and only me.

• Be creative  

Now, don’t get me wrong, yoga and breathwork are great foundations to regulate, but not if it is just one more thing on your to-do list.  If it is a must do tick which leaves you racing to get to on time, then run out the door to get to your next check box, is it truly restorative?  

We need to find activities that stimulate the vagus nerve and promote a sense of safety and security. You might be better off turning up the music; singing, laughing and dancing in your kitchen to shake off your extra stored energy. Maybe a grounding technique such as a cold shower or walking barefoot or finding a dark space and taking some slow deep breaths where you count the length and release.  Find what works for you!  

For today, where do I start?

I am going to go for a walk- without my headphones.  I’m going to crawl in bed earlier with my physical book and make a list of priorities of what needs to happen over the next two weeks.  If I have a comprehensive idea of what, I can then make an effort to not get further behind. 

I want to look at the next ten days as a re-set for my mental and physical health so that ten days from now I am ready to run! I am going to enjoy this gift of ten days with my boys. I am ready to set myself up for where I want to be ten days from now- healthy, regulated, and ready to get my work done.  

This Week’s A Door Within:

• How does your body feel today?

• How does dysregulation manifest within me?

• What is the cause?

• For today, where do I start?

♥Ashley